Saturday, September 08, 2007


A cure? For nail biting? Please. I have bitten my nails ever since I had teeth, and if I wanted to quit, I would have done it by now. (God knows my parents tried everything they could think of, bless them.) I don’t need to pay some damn Dutchman $670 for a mouth guard. It’s no wonder his customers were too embarrassed to be interviewed. These are probably the same people who buy those products advertised in the backs of teen magazines. (And if I were this reporter’s editor, I would have spiked this story. The damn Dutchman can buy his own ad in the back of the paper if he wants one.)

At least now I know the word for it: onychophagy. Sure, it’s not a clean habit. I do try to be vigilant about biting at work during flu season. And I consciously keep my nails from being too gross: they don’t bleed, they aren’t ragged; they’re just very, very short nails. I kind of like that I bite them. I enjoy it. It’s something I do while I’m thinking. (And hell yes, I bite my toenails. I am very bendy.)

The tone of this story is completely out of control. “Self-mutilation”? “Obsessive-compulsive disorder”? For Christ’s sake, we don’t have to diagnose and treat everything. People are untidy. We get sad; we eat too much sometimes; we bite our nails. If we had no flaws, we’d be boring. We’re beautiful as we are.

This violent reaction has nothing to do with having just watched “X-Men 3” again. Really.


Gina said...

I too am a nail biter.

Judging from this "cure" article I am a shameful, dirty, OCD sicko.

It's nice to know I am in good company. :)

AE said...

Onychophagy is more fun than we probably ought to let on, that's certain.

Marc said...

Emma, just keep biting them, and be yourself. You enjoy biting them, so what's the problem here? BTW, short nails look way cool on a girl's fingertips. So, don't sweat it. How short are yours? And, it's onychophagia.

Marc said...

Gina, you go, girl! I love girls who are nailbiters. You girls who bite your nails are usually fun to be around.